kiwords

So the sun has gone down, you've been bathed and dressed in your jammies. Your parents have that glassy-eyed look that tells you it's time to get this party started. Here's how I put together a all-night dance party look for the toddler set.

Of course, it's important to start with the basics: bath-damp hair, skin that's glossy with baby oil, and zipped up footie jammies. This is a good look - a strong start. But this ensemble is still missing something.

Do you have any plastic links in the house? Of course you do. Take them to your mother and scream until she separates them all from each other. Really put some effort into the screaming. The sound you're shooting for should remind one of a monkey, warning the other monkeys that an enormous monster is about to eat them all. A shrieking, shrill, horrifically loud monkey. Excellent.

Now take your links and slide them, one by one, onto your wrist.

Keep going.

Too much is not enough. This also goes for the aforementioned screaming.

How do you know when you've got enough? Are there any left? Then keep going, sister.

There. You're all dressed to fight sleep for a few hours! Gorgeous!

Up next: extreme accessorizing. It's not for the weak of heart.

And then: how to style your daddy. (Hint: step 1- remove him from your little finger.)