The Question of the Unexpected Guest
December 22, 2009
This afternoon I was making fudge. This was a challenge, as Sophia simply Would Not be put down today. Dad had taken the boys away for an adventure (one that included both candle making AND poking a fire - I don't ask), so it was just me and Princess Pick-Me-Up.
There I was, with a baby slung on my hip, my left breast stippled with tiny fingerprints in marshmallow cream, and every surface in my kitchen covered with cooking detritus (this does not require quite as much detritus as you might think).
With the boys gone the house was far too quiet, so I turned on the TV for background noise, and I ended up half listening to a cooking show. The host was giving suggestions for appetizers and drinks that you could throw together in a hurry for those unexpected guests.
Unexpected guests, I mused. Who ARE these fabled unexpected guests?
Seriously, it seems like every Holiday Hospitality article I have ever read has tips for dealing with these people. WHO ARE THEY? And what sort of power do they wield, that people feel obligated to bust out a full buffet for them when they do drop in randomly? If a friend of mine showed up, unannounced, I wouldn't feel guilty that I hadn't lit candles before I answered the door. I'd say, "OH, hey! Come on in. Just sort of...kick those toys to the side. Would you like some...um...Cheerios and mango? Because I have some stuck to my shirt, right here." I might offer to make some tea (I find most occasions can only be improved by tea). But for the most part, hey, this is my life. If you want the pretty picture version of it, let me know you're coming. Even then, no guarantees, am I right, Amy?
But I don't find that to be a problem, because I seriously cannot remember the last time I had unexpected visitors. It seems to happen with maddening regularity in the world of magazine writers and TV hosts, but IT NEVER HAPPENS TO ME.
Do the Unexpected Guests hate me? Am I the only one they're not terrorizing with their hospitality spot-checks? Am I UNPOPULAR? Do they visit everyone except me?
These are the questions that would keep me up at night if I weren't currently so sleep deprived that I doze through red lights.
ROFL @ "OH, hey! Come on in. Just sort of...kick those toys to the side. Would you like some...um...Cheerios and mango? Because I have some stuck to my shirt, right here"
Oh, heavens, this is ME!!! Thanks for the early-morning laugh, and MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Posted by: Damsel | December 23, 2009 at 03:30 AM
I never have unexpected guests. I guess I'm not loved either LOL. I love your Cheerios line, made me laugh. Have a Merry Christmas!!!!
Posted by: Lisa in NJ | December 23, 2009 at 05:54 AM
You are sleep deprived! Don't you remember all those times we dropped in, stood around interrupting your current endeavors and beaming at whatever kid happened to ricocheting off of us at the moment? I must say, we often lay awake into the night (until at least 9:05) agonizing about the lack of surprising and tasty comfits and fresh vintage Izze in crystal goblets, of tastefully arranged flowers and candles. But we do like the mango.
Posted by: Amma Always | December 23, 2009 at 05:57 AM
You are too funny. Apparently being sleep deprived agrees with you. I never have
unexpected guests either, must not be loved.
Posted by: Michelle | December 23, 2009 at 06:17 AM
Was going to unexpectedly drop in later today, but changed my mind after reading this.
Just kidding - I have had unexpected company, and once they kicked the crap off the couch and I found the coffee pot, we had a great time. I am glad though, it was just once.
Posted by: Cheryl | December 23, 2009 at 06:33 AM
You are so right. And have I ever told you how impressed I am that you can even offer tea in the midst of your household's goings on? Mighty impressive. I never even notice the mango! And seriously, between three adorable boys and one adorable baby girl, and the chance there might be freshly-baked cookies, I'm just now wondering why I don't show up unannounced more often. Today might be good. (That doesn't count as announced.) Hmm.
Posted by: Groovecatmom | December 23, 2009 at 07:21 AM
My mom is my only unexpected guest and she usually stops by unexpectedly on Saturday mornings, so I know to possibly expect her. I guess I don't have unexpected guests either. Darn it.
Posted by: Karly | December 23, 2009 at 08:24 AM
I have often mused about my lack of Unexpected Guests. I am happy to know that I am not the only person without that problem.
As for Princess Pick-Me-Up: I had a baby daughter of the same demeanor. My salvation was a baby carrier backpack. I wore it around the house constantly for many months and she was very content. And you can't beat vacuuming with a 25-pound baby on your back for a good work-out. Just try not to think about what your hair might look like as she drools on it and plays with it.
Posted by: Mel | December 23, 2009 at 08:44 AM
I can remember earlier this year 9 people showing up unexpectedly, initiated by my dad, who had a good time even without the customary cheerio and mango hors d' oeuvres.
I think that the only thing unexpected guests can be guaranteed at our house is interesting and thoughtful conversation. That is enough.
Posted by: Clay | December 23, 2009 at 08:59 AM
I'm announcing now that I will be in town for the holidays....whether or not that means that I'll be able to drop by announced or un remains to be seen. Merry Christmas my dear friends!
Posted by: Amy | December 23, 2009 at 10:02 AM
I never see those people either. The most unexpected guest we've had was my mom when my house was a pigsty lol. She didn't mind.
Posted by: Mary Jo | December 23, 2009 at 03:04 PM
I really wish my life allowed me to drop in unexpectedly. Throwing that chaos grenade into your life is so much fun.
Just wait. I mean, it won't be a decade that starts with a 1 or anything, but eventually....
Posted by: TheOneTrueJosh | December 23, 2009 at 05:05 PM
Hi! call: Kamagra tablets in pakistan :: Kamagra supplier viagra vigra kamagra cialis Kamagra in groningen Kamagra UPS delivery only Cheap Kamagra for sale pharmacy and Kamagra sild nafil citrate tablets 100mg , Oral Jelly canada Kamagra tablets 100mg tadalafil Kamagra tablets Kamagra plus side effects online shop Kamagra online India Kamagra without a prescription = 100mg UK tablets Kamagra , Kamagra tablets price Kamagra Oral Jelly last minute fast Kamagra certified Online pharmacy viagra cialis london Kamagra Kamagra Oral Jelly review canada online without or viagra Kamagra caverta ..::! Let's keep in touch! And Hot new sexy site -> http://eurovids.us/ ....!!!
Posted by: 001::Toxwosiscon | November 22, 2011 at 01:10 AM
Christmas discounts - Is it ... ?! call: Indian Kamagra Kamagra suppliers in scotland and - Viagra Cialis Kamagra One of the most common fake Viagra medications is called Kamagra and it is mainly manufactured in India. The dangers of using this fake medication have been highlighted recently after an American tourist passed away after using a Kamagra tablet. The man who was on holiday in Thailand died just before he attempted to have sex a lady he had met in the holiday resort of Pattaya. Despite the lady in question trying to resuscitate the man he was dead by the time the police arrived and no foul play is suspected. online pharmacy Kamagra from Canada Kamagra s ljes Cheap Generic Kamagra UK Viagra Buy c.o.d. Kamagra without RX cost of Kamagra Kamagra Oral Jelly 100mg family Kamagra shop tablets Oral Kamagra gel Thailand low cost Kamagra without a prescription Kamagra 100mg cialis Buy Cheap Kamagra overnight Fedex UK supplier Kamagra online Buy next day Kamagra online from Canada ... I'm looking forward to seeing you again! Kamagra tablets in India manufactured ......http://eurovids.us - Hot porn new - go find sex dates and porn star victoria spencer ..!!!
Posted by: stennaannog | December 20, 2011 at 01:51 AM
It aims to alter harmful behaviours by replacing them with positive ones. read more about valium here: http://www.diazepambuyonline.net cheapest valium And if you ask anybody living there it's a depression, absolutely.
Posted by: RoloEnlitte | May 29, 2012 at 02:00 PM