Frenetic Kinetic
January 02, 2006
You’ve probably heard about learning modalities. Simply put, it means that people absorb information best through different pathways. Some people need to see things to understand them, others need to hear them. Tre is what’s called a kinesthetic learner. “Kinesthetic” is from the Latin for “wearies his mother half to death with the moving and fidgeting and leaping.”
When Tre was four years old we participated in a research study. This required Tre to undergo a developmental screening. For the first portion of the test, I answered questions about Tre’s behavior. While I sat on the couch with the woman administering the test, Tre sat at the table, coloring. Midway through her questions, the woman looked over at him, bent over his crayons, and sighed.
“Look at how well he concentrates. My son could NEVER sit still that long.” She nodded at me sadly. “He has ADD, you know.” I nodded back, trying to look sympathetic, and NOT like I won at having the best kid.
When we were done with our section of the screening, the woman asked Tre to come sit down with her on the couch. She proceeded to ask him questions for about 45 minutes. He listened and answered carefully (scoring, I might add humbly, WAY ABOVE his age in math and reasoning skills). But as they talked, his legs started to move. They bounced against the couch cushion, then one ankle flipped up over the leg of the couch. Soon the other ankle followed it, and Tre was sitting sideways on the couch. He continued the interview with the utmost serious devotion, as his legs continued their journey up, over the back of the couch. Soon he was sitting with his feet planted on the wall, his head dangling toward the floor. The woman squinted at him and pointed at her picture.
“Which of these do you use to make breakfast?”
“That one. The waffle iron,” he replied, poking his finger at the picture. She flipped to the next page. His grubby feet patpatpatted the wall. She turned to give me a meaningful look.
“Well,” she murmured in an aside, “I guess we can’t always RULE OUT ADD right away, now can we?”
I was stunned – STUNNED. Were we looking at the same child? Was she observing my very own upside down son, who was attending with all his considerable brain power from his bat-like vantage point? Did she see THAT BOY, who was totally smoking the median six year old with his reasoning ability? HE WAS CONCENTRATING JUST FINE, he just happened to be MOVING A LOT WHILST HE DID IT.
I finished the interview with a very superior feeling. SHE, after all, simply DID NOT UNDERSTAND my son and his learning modality. I, on the other hand, DID, and could appreciate him for the special, capable boy he is.
Now at this point, six years later, I could still be sitting here, sniffing haughtily at the memory, IF ONLY I hadn’t snapped at my dear kinesthetic son about twelve bazillion times in the last half decade, “COULD YOU JUST HOLD STILL?” I know, I KNOW he needs to move to process information, yet in my deepest animal brain I can’t understand how he can READ and WIGGLE so much. When I’m sitting next to him, trying to explain a math concept to him and he’s listening and at the same time rolling a wad of silly putty up and down and up and down and up and down his arm, well. I wish for him to have a fulfilling educational experience, but first I wish to remove his HEAD, GOOD LORD, JUST HOLD STILL FOR A MINUTE SO I CAN THINK.
Kira=not so much a kinesthetic learner.
However, I am proud to say I did REACH OUT to my son in his frenetic kinetic-ness. I got him an exercise ball to sit on while he does school. The theory behind this is that the myriad little movements necessary to keep him seated on the ball would be a good outlet for his need for movement. And you know what? It works! He loves the ball! He sits happily on it, perched on his knees, bouncing and wobbling and concentrating just fine. I have to avert my eyes and do my Lamaze breathing, but HEY, the ball isn’t for me, right?
The problem is HOW MUCH he loves the ball. The ball has become his constant companion, his best friend. It bounces down the hall ahead of him, rolls around under his feet while he sits and reads, perches on his shoulder as he trots down the stairs. The ball is driving me nuts. I actually warned Tre that if THAT BALL came in the kitchen one more time while I was trying to cook dinner, I would ATTACK IT WITH MY KITCHEN SHEARS.
No really. I said that.
Kira=not so patient a mother as she’d like to be.
Tre bounces on, gleefully enjoying his rubbery purple sidekick (he also manages to keep it out of the kitchen while I’m cooking – CLEAR evidence that the constant motion is a boon to his listening skills). And I try really hard to at least APPEAR to be fine with all the MOVING and the BOUNDING and the ROLLING, because otherwise how am I going to feel superior to the test-taking woman?
So he twirls and moves and moves and moves and I am reminded again how fascinating and odd and inconveniently wonderful kids are.