kiwords

You know what I hate? I hate that comic strip, “Marmaduke.” You know the one? It’s about a dog, a Great Dane, if I’m not mistaken, and how annoying he is. The “joke” in every strip is something about how Marmaduke is taking up all of the bed, or the couch, or he’s tracking mud in the house, or dragging his hapless owner pell-mell on a walk. His owners are forever looking harried and helpless as he eats their food and sits on their guests and just generally makes their lives hell.

It bugs me because

a) It’s just not funny. I mean. I know “funny” is an elusive quality, and some days I just CRACK MYSELF UP when no one else seems to get it, so I’m willing to grant a great deal of leeway on the subject. But I’m sorry, Marmaduke JUST ISN’T FUNNY. Not. Sorry. Plus,

b) The central, repeating theme is how annoying an animal Marmaduke is, yet no one ever DEALS with him. They could get him in some sort of giant rambunctious dog training or find a new home for him.

After a while, wouldn’t you have to get over it or get rid of the dog? If you DON’T pass the dog along to some other, more patient soul with more room and less friends, haven’t you signed up for whatever abuse you get?

It’s sort of like when I’m talking to a friend, and she’s moaning for the ten thousandth time about how badly her buddy at work treats her. Gah. I’m sorry, I am, but after a while you have to do something about it or accept it.

Ok, you don’t HAVE to, but it annoys me.

It annoys me when people let themselves be treated badly, and then complain about it as though they were surprised.

What does all this have to do with Momwriters? Well, for those of you who don’t know, MW is a list serve that caters to…well, moms who write. There are actually a few men on the list too, which I find odd, to tell you the truth. Whatever.

Anyhow, recently the owner of the list decided she would make it a subscription service, to the tune of $5 a month. With 1500 members (at the time). You do the math.

What followed was a deafening silence (no responses were allowed onlist), and then some fairly offensive posts (in my opinion) from the list owner, defending her choice. The discussion moved offlist (check out Joshilyn’s well crafted response – don’t miss the comments), and I followed it with righteous indignation.

How COULD she?

Can you BELIEVE?

What about when she said THIS?

And now, after a few days of discussion by the eloquent members of this community, I’m done*. I’m still a member of the list – at least until January, when I’ll be kicked off. I’m not paying for the privilege of reading emails. I don’t know if I’ll wait to be kicked off or if I’ll unsub.

But after the last few days it’s pretty clear to me the treatment I can expect from this corner, a place that used to be a haven for me. It’s sad, but now that I’m done being surprised, the only thing left for me to do is choose my response.

*Please don’t think I’m suggesting anyone else should stop discussing the matter. Process at your own pace. I’ve been impressed with the civility of the whole thing. I’m just saying I am done.