Here are some people I love, making no sense.

Ring my bell curve

I would never dream of admitting this in a public forum, but since it’s just you and me, internets, let me tell you a small secret: sometimes my sons baffle me. In particular, Tre baffles me. When Max or Raphael hit a new phase in their lives, I can almost always shrug and say, Oh, right, I remember when Tre did that. Not to worry. But Tre hits a new era, and I find myself watching him out of the corner of my eye, wondering, Soooo, is this normal, then?

He interrupts and ignores the people around him. He talks and talks and talks about things like the interesting facts about snot he learned at the Grossology exhibit at the museum, but thinks an acceptable answer to, “Hi there! How are you?” is a mutter and a shrug. A shrug aimed at the floor.

I look at him and mentally count, with much trembling, the years I have left to form him into a functioning human being.

I don’t think there’s enough time.

Tonight Tre had a Cub Scout meeting (Patrol meeting). They were working on their requirements for their Communicator badge. The boys sat in a wriggling semi-circle at the feet of the Patrol leader, who spoke into their midst with admirable calm.

“Today we’re going to talk about communicating,” he announced.

“Is there going to be a snack?” some boy shouted.

“Yes, later. Let’s settle down now, so we can get through this.” One boy wandered away, picked up a pillow of the couch, and proceeded to whack himself repeatedly in the head with it. This lasted until his father could stand it no longer. He strode across the room and snatched the pillow away, glaring at his son, who looked bewildered.

The leader was motioning at an outline of communication styles.

“See, first we have speaking. Most communication is done through speaking.”

“Mom says I talk too much!” someone announced. “I’m gonna tell her you said to speak MORE.”

“Well, that’s not exactly what I said. Anyhow, next we have sign language. Does anyone here know sign language?”

“I have a dog! He smells bad!” Not sure which boy shared that.

“Oooookay, then, and there’s also newspapers, that’s another form of communication.”

“WHO FARTED?” This…form of communication caused great hilarity among the group. It took a few minutes to get them all to stop laughing, rolling around on the floor, and pretending to throw up. After settling them down, the leader gamely pressed on with his outline.

“And television – television is another way people communicate.”

“We have a TV!”

“HEY, did you know people sometimes get their heads cut of on TV?”

The leader nodded thoughtfully at the seething mass of boys and said slowly,

“Yes. Well. Thank you for sharing. Now Mark is going to explain to you all how a computer works.”

I watched him motion for another parent to start his demonstration, and I relaxed back on the couch, quite content.

I’m not saying Tre's NORMAL, exactly, but he sure blends into his peer group. I would even go so far as to say he’s doing rather well compared to some. The bell curve: the friend of concerned mothers everywhere.


Deb Hardison

If you don't want to be supremely disappointed, read no further. I have it on good authority that once boys with Hardison blood in them enter this um... stage, it becomes more of a lifestyle than a stage... you might as well accept it & save yourself a lot of grief. Hazel just shakes her head and says "Oh Wayne. Who raised you?"


I've been shaking my head for 3 years. He's 12 now and I just keep shaking. I don't understand men, why did I think I would be able to understand a boy? Girls are complicated, but understandable. Boys are... boys.

It's a fun ride though. Isn't it?

(oh, I don't think I've commented on your site before, though I've been lurking forever. Congrats, and good luck planning the wedding. Cake is a very good start.)


ROFLMAO Sounds JUST like my house!


i promise that there is another stage after this one! S1 & 2 (22 and 19 yo) are there- they talk like adults! S3 (13) isn't there yet, but there is hope. do not despair!


Did any of them answer a "good morning, did you sleep well?" greeting with, "I am going to chop you in half?" No?


Nevermind, then. I gotta get me one of them there bell curves....


And that is why we sign up our children for things like Scouts. Because watching them in groups is the easiest way to gauge where they are on the "normal" scale. :)

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