Letting go
Grown up popcorn peddler

Soccer diamond

Friday afternoon I was on the way to soccer practice. Did I tell you Tre and Max are playing soccer? Yeah, they are. I’ll have to remember to describe their individual soccer styles for you sometime. Suffice to say, I suspect I won’t be retiring in the Bahamas off the proceeds from their soccer careers.

Anyhow, this particular afternoon I was irritated. Annoyed. Peeved. It had taken roughly seven hours to get the boys connected with their soccer gear and in the car. One shin guard mysteriously disappeared from Tre’s room, and a frantic last-minute search failed to unearth it. This was no real surprise, considering that he seems to have collected half of the physical reality of the world IN HIS ROOM, and has deposited it in a jumble on the floor on the far side of his bed. So from the door, it looks like a relatively tidy room. Given to outbreaks of bookmarks and Coinstruction sets, perhaps, but other than that, livable. But then, when I stepped INTO the room and peered over on the other side of his bed, I found acreages of junk. Paper airplanes, Bionicle bits, eons of old magazines, GOOD LORD WHERE DOES IT ALL COME FROM?


We could NOT find his missing shin guard amidst the mess, so he opted to go shin-guard free, and stomped off to the car, stewing in a sense of unfairness. In the meantime, however, Max had been gamboling through the house with both his soccer ball AND Tre’s. This was intended as a helpful gesture. He was planning to bring his brother’s soccer ball to the van for him.

Except what he did was wander into his room for something, drop both balls, meander around, and when I called him to the van, grab HIS ball, completely forgetting his brother’s. So when Tre was sent to fetch HIS soccer ball, he raced helplessly through the house, tearing from room to room, utterly perplexed. He would not, you understand, ever go in Max’s room to look for it. WHY WOULD IT BE THERE?

Eventually I found the ball (thanks to magical Mom-sense – like Spidey-sense, but less tingly), corralled all boys and related soccer gear in the van, and set off down the road. The trip to soccer practice was accompanied by The Sound of My Voice, as I harped upon my lovely boys about such concepts as Responsibility and Tidiness and Punctuality. They heard “wah wah wah wah wah wah.”

A good time was had by all.

Eventually I arrived at the park where practice was being held. Silence had fallen in the van. Raphi was asleep in his car seat, and Max and Tre were mute, rather than taking the chance of activating The Sound of My Voice again. As I pulled into the parking lot, I saw Clay, waiting for us. He strode over to the van, and as soon as I parked, he pulled open the back passenger’s side door and crawled in, right in the midst of the boys. In his hand he had a piece of paper.

“Did you see this?” He asked. I smiled and said I had. It was an email from a lender we’d been talking to. We were prequalified for a mortgage, meaning we could house-hunt in earnest (did I tell you we’re looking for a house? No? Huh. My bad). The boys started to stir in their seats, releasing seatbelts and scrabbling for soccer balls.

“Wait a minute guys,” Clay said, “I need to ask something. See, this has got me thinking about the past, present, and future.” He looked at me. “We both have a past, and I’m glad, because it’s brought us here today to be together. This,” he held up the paper, “is our future, the home we’ll live in as a family. So that leaves today. And today I have to ask you something. Will you marry me?”

I saw a flash of a diamond, Clay’s slightly teary eyes, and behind him the grinning faces of Tre and Max, as they craned to look over his shoulder and see my response.

P1010025_6 I said yes. And I cried.

Max leaped on Clay’s back, shouting, “YOU FINALLY ASKED MY MAMA TO MARRY YOU!” Raphael woke up, and crawled into my lap. I showed him the ring and asked him if he knew what it meant. He studied it, then whispered,

“Clay will marry you, and I will have a dad.” He buried his face in my chest, then peeked at Clay shyly.

I didn’t get Tre’s reaction until later, as we were climbing back into the van after practice. Max suddenly realized he NEEDED the bathroom, RIGHT THEN, so Clay ran off with him to find one. As I passed out post-practice dinner, I casually asked Tre,

“So…what do you think about this ‘being engaged’ stuff?” I tried not to push too hard. Certainly he knew I was happy about this, and of all the boys, he would be the one who would strive to give me the “right” answer. So I didn’t push for eye contact, and tried to keep it light. He looked right at me and lit up the van with a smile.

“I’m gonna have a dad again.” We grinned at each other. “You get to be married, and I get to have a dad. That’s cool.”

It really is.

ps - can you tell the ring's a touch large and needs to be sized?

pps - three diamonds - past, present, and future. How romantic is HE?

ppps - February 18. Or, as my mom pointed out to me today, four months and nine days. Commence freaking out.

pppps - I love him so much. What else is there to say?



Wow! Delurking from long-time silent reading to say Congratulations! That is so wonderful! And I love the way Clay asked - so romantic *sigh*. Wishing you all lots and lots of happiness.
Kaz in Oz


You did explain to Clay the part where he treats you right or I kick his ass, right? Oh, never mind, I'll tell him myself. ;)

Life is hard. God is good.

Love you.

Linda Sherwood

Sniff. Sniff.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! I am THRILLED for all of you. :)


Even if the Internet wasn't the first to find out. Sniff. Sniff...


Much blessings and congratulations!! (From a long-time lurker). :)


Kira! I am so happy for you! I wish I could grab you and jump and squal! Send me your snail mail. K! I had it at one point, but it's gone and I suddenly fidn I NEED it.





How wonderful! Congratulations!

Sheri Guyse

Totally NOT crying right now. Very happy for you, but totally not sobbing like a wee little girl.

So COMPLETELY thrilled for you!!!


That's wonderful! I am so happy for you, and for Clay, and for your boys. Hooray!


Delurking to say Congratulations! I am so very happy for you, Clay and the boys!


Oh, my word. What a fantastic soccer day! Congratulations to all of you!


Wow, congratulations! That's very cool!

(Need a Realtor?! :) )


Congrats, Clay and Kira! Wow, 4 months, 9 days.... :)


Delurking to say congrats!!

Feb. 18 is my wedding anniversary - will be 17 years in '06. So I consider it a very lucky day! :-)


Congrats! Followed the crumbs from Mir's site. Figured one of her friends had the question popped to them...

Marriage can be a fun thing. I also like to think of the three diamonds as one for each of your boys as well as the past present and future.

Fraulein N

Mir tipped me off to the good news. Congratulations!!! That was a beautiful proposal!



Oh my Gosh I am crying at the good fortune and blessing that has come to all of you.You absolutely MUST register online.


YAY!!! I was hoping, when I read the title to your post. I'm so happy for you and your whole big little family.


Oh! My! Goodness! oh, Congratulations, Kira! I am *so* happy for all of you!

Mary Jo

OH! I am so very excited for you! This is such wonderful news, Kira. What a wonderful surprise! Congratulations.


YESS! O Frabjous Day! I am SO GLAD for you. Clay rocks.

My due date is Feb. 22, so hopefully I won't go into labor early and miss reading about your big day! :-) Let the wild rumpus start!


Congrats, you five! Very cool, indeed. Um, you did tell Clay's family before you posted this, right? *winking*


Yowza. Many congratulations to you. Thank you for sharing with us.


How lovely ... to be loved by such a romantic thoughtful man. It gives me hope ... wishing your family all the happiness that's possible.


that is so awesome!!!

i am so happy for you!!



I knew it! I can smell an engagment ring a mile away. Congradulations Kira, I am beyond happy for you. You and your boys deserve all the happiness in the world. Best wishes and internet love.


Congratulations! How exciting and best wishes.

And the beginning of the soccer story? Sounds like my house when it is time for my daughter to get ready for practice.


Hope you told the parents and others like you promised, first. ;-)


Now look what you've done....my makeup is smearing...oh wait did I say that out loud?



How amazingly wonderful and romantic. Perfect! Congratulations. I needed that warm fuzzy and am thrilled to have read this today.


That is the best news I've heard allllll day!!! Whoo-hoo! How extremely faboo for all five of you!


That's just...wonderful. God bless you in your new life together!


are you going to have to talk the boys out of wearing their soccer uniforms for the ceremony? i'm tingling with the wonderfulness of it all for all of you!


Got here via Mir's blog to see what the exciting news was! Congrats! Did not know I was missing so much good stuff!


Huge congratulations from a longtime lurker. I'm so happy for all of you!

Laura GF

I'm just so happy for you and the boys -- congratulations. Clay is so lucky to have all four of you in his life. Your post brought tears to my eyes. It's just so nice to hear things going so right for someone who so truly deserves it. Can't wait to read about the wedding!

Heather Cook

Bwaaahhhh! You got engaged! Wow! SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! How romantic... right in front of the boys and everything! SO SWEET! Oh I feel all tingly.


Congratulations to all of you. (Mir sent me!)

I especially love how your boys are so happy as well. Feb 18 is the day before my anniversary. I will be thinking of you! (on your honeymoon by then, right?)


I am sitting here just bawling right now!
I think that its just about the BEST news i have heard in a long time!
Here is to many many many years of love and laughter and happiness for all of you!


A long-time lurker is sitting here at work, halfway around the work, cheering for you and your family :) YAY!


A long-time lurker is sitting here at work, halfway around the world, cheering for you and your family :) YAY!


I got chills. And tears. Those of us who have known you since, well, you know how long...this is truly wonderful! Congrats to all of you, and I am so blessed to be witnessing all your happiness. Love you, girl!!!

PS - It feels more personal to me because, well, knowing my husband is my kids' REAL dad...despite not being their bio, and I know how much your boys will grow having this REAL dad there to love them.


wow, I haven't visited in so long and I find this! Congrats, you so deserve it, Clay is a great guy and you two will be so happy together.

However, how you are going to manage organising soccer, a house and a wedding in 4 months - put on your super women cape!

Mir's dad

The best stories are always the one's told "fresh" about stuff that actually happens.
Best wishes to all of you.


OMG! Congratulations!!!!

I don't even "know" you, yet I'm BAWLING here.

I'm so happy for all of you!!!!!


Congratulations!!! February 18 is a special day for me...it was my grandmother's birthday and she was a wonderful woman. How exciting for you and your boys!


Oh! Oh! Oh!

Congratulations! How wonderful!


Finally! I'm so excited for you and the boys! Congratulations! May God bless you and your new family!

Barb Huff

Congrats, sweetie! What wonderful news.


Oh. My. God. I love that story! I have chills and tears over here. TEARS. I am so happy for you. Sounds like the perfect man for you. *hugs*


:) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


WAHOO!!! I'm sitting here squealing and screaming with delight and confusing my daughters vastly. "Why are you so excited, Mommy? Why are you so happy?"

This is so incredibly fantastic!!! Yay!!!!!

Three cheers for Clay and Kira!


Congratulations! What a beautiful story and I'm so happy for you.


P.S. Thanks for reading and reading and...choosing me as one of the B4B finalist. What fun!


Yay Kira! I've been waiting for a post just like this one for so long!! Give that sweet hunk o' man a big hug from me!


I am so happy for you! And for the boys! Clay sounds like a wonderful man! Congrats to all of you.


Clearly I'm WAY behind in my blog reading, but I couldn't pass this by without sending out a huge (albeit belated) congratulations!! How awesome! :)


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