kiwords

So guess where I am? Saint Simons Island, Georgia. No, really! We’re here on vacation for the next week and a half. This sounded like a good idea to me, very relaxing and rejuvenating. I’ve been looking forward to it for weeks. Then we spent the first night in the hotel in Atlanta last night, and now I'm wondering if this is such a good idea.
Mom and Dad were in their room next door and Tre, Max, Raphael and I were sharing a room. Tre and Max had one bed; Raphi and I were in the other. The bedtime adventures started with my bright idea, sleep balm. I’d bought it before we’d left at the health food store, sure it must be a wonderful thing. It’s fragrant with chamomile and lavender, and promises a good night’s sleep.
“Look, guys, I have something here that will help you settle down and get to sleep! It’s sleep balm!”
“Sleep bomb?” Max replied incredulously.
“No, honey, look,” I showed him the tin, “sleep balm. I’m going to rub it on your temples and-“
But Max and Tre were too busy demonstrating the imagined affects of a sleep bomb. Great spit-flinging explosion noises were being made, and they flung themselves onto the bed, where they promptly fell into loud, snoring fake sleep.
Well, I rubbed the stuff on their temples, darn it, even though every time I approached them with it they dissolved into imaginary explosions. It promised a good night’s sleep.
It lied.
By the time everyone was in jammies and their beds, I was exhausted. They, on the other hand, seem invigorated by the process. They wanted to discuss which lights should be left on, how many pillows they should have, and if the air conditioner really needed to be on. Raphael hopped up to go to the bathroom no less than seventeen times, attempting to swipe Max’s teddy bear on his way back to bed each time. This caused a great outcry from Max, who would wrench the bear out of his brother’s hands, causing Raphael to respond with a heartfelt wail at the injustice of it all.
Eventually I got them all settled back in their assigned spots, only to have the discussion portion of the evening begin.
“What was that word again? The one Josh told you was the name for the biggest number?” Tre asked. I sighed.
“Googolplex.” This sent Tre and Max into gales of laughter, with Raphael joining in. He’s always happy to lend his support to any hilarity.
“So can there be like…two googolplex?” Tre asked.
“Yeah,” Max said, “like a twoogloplex?”
More gales of laughter. I mean, if googolplex is funny, twoogloplex – that’s brilliant.
“I don’t know. You’ll have to ask Josh next time you talk to him. But for now, GO TO SLEEP.”
I used the voice of doom, so they settled down pretty quickly. A moment’s silence fell over the room, then Max whispered, “Twoogloplex.”
You get the picture. After roughly twelve hours of this sort of behavior, I was finally able to get Tre and Max to be quiet long enough that they actually fell asleep. This left Raphael.
*sigh*
Sweet Raphi was thrilled to have someone to chat with there in bed. He tends to take a while to wind down to sleep as it is, and thought the fact that I was right there to play with was wonderful. He jumped down from the bed to bring me a stuffed snake. He found his toy train and drove it over my face. He twisted himself around and plopped his feet on the pillow next to me, then casually reached one foot over to see if his big toe fit up my nose. He pretended his hand was a spider and crawled it all over my head. And every so often during his anti-sleep campaign, he’d throw an arm around my neck and murmur cozily in my ear, “Do we need to get up now?”
“No,” I replied through clenched teeth, “GO TO SLEEP.”
“But – ah just tryin’ to get up!”
“It’s not time to get up. It’s time to SLEEP.”
He flopped down on his pillow, clearly unimpressed by me. He laid there quietly for a few minutes, then reached over with his toy train and drove it into my ear.
”Say hi to James,” he ordered. James was quickly removed from the scene and put on the side table to sleep until morning. When I turned back I found Raphael with the phone, furiously dialing. He simply could not believe that I was going to take the phone away from him too.
This went on for at least one hundred years. But eventually Raphael’s activity slowed, then stopped. His eyes fluttered shut…then open…then shut. He sighed, then settled into the deep breathing of sleep.
My right arm was pinned underneath him. The lumpy tail of the stuffed snake was under my shoulder and Raphael’s feet were wedged under my hip, twitching slightly as though he were dreaming of chasing rabbits. But all of that was ok, because all my boys were finally asleep. And sleep is good. So very, very…zzzzzzzzzzz