kiwords

Raphael has taken to swearing. Now, I have my weaknesses as a mother, but foul language is not one of them. I can’t even think in four letter words anymore. So he’s not using actual swear words, just “bad” words of his understanding. His favorite is “stupid.” So whenever anything irritates him – his brothers, the cat, his sock, the alignment of the planets – anything, he glares at it and mutters, “Stoopid.” This is followed up by a sticking out of the tongue, complete with tongue sticking out noise, “mmmmmmmm.” He spends so much time declaring things stupid that he’s been forbidden to say the word.
This afternoon he was annoyed with Tre. Tre had done nothing other than exist between the area Raphael was in and the area he wanted to be in. Raphi was stopped, mid-charge, by Tre’s indisputable solid existence, so he responded by shrieking at him, “Stoopid Tre! Mmmmmmmmm!”
“Raphael Joseph!” If I say his first and middle name in the right tone I don’t even have to follow it up with, “go sit on the stairs in time out.” He whipped around at the sound of my voice and his shoulders sagged at the injustice of it all. Sorrowfully he stomped down the hallway and plopped down on the stairs.
After a suitable period of time, I announced he was free to leave the stairs. He leaped up, only to step on a block right in front of the bottom stair.
“Ow!” he hollered, “Stoopid block!”
Sigh.
Any letters to Raphael in the near future can be addressed to
“Master Raphael Joseph,
C/o The Stairs.”
Speaking of bad words, I found a letter from Max the other day. I’ll spare you the spelling, although I made Mom and Dad read it several times. It’s just so cool. Anyhow, the letter said, “Dear Mom, I know a lot of bad words. But I shouldn’t say it. Love, Max.”
I showed Max the letter and asked if he’d tell me what the bad words are. He looked around furtively for a moment, then leaned in and whispered, “Booger.”
I had to smile, relishing how innocent their lives still are in many ways. Just then he piped up again, “Oh, and Mama? What’s gay mean?”