kiwords

Max is really into drawing pictures and writing captions for them. Now, he’s just five, so his spelling is not exactly standard. For example, he signs every picture “by Tre and Max,” even though Tre has yet to ever draw a picture with him. Max just likes to include his brother. Anyhow, he spells this phrase something like “bi Tre end Max.”
These pictures are a sight to behold. They usually feature a tree in the very center, with happy people with square bodies and long thin necks gathered around. In one picture he showed me and Tre on one side of the tree, smiling ecstatically. On the other side was Raphi, who was pushing over a very annoyed Max. So not only is he a prolific artist, he’s a realist.
The other morning I wandered into the kitchen, where Dad was making his famous waffles for breakfast. I came upon Max, showing a newly drawn picture to Dad.
“See?” He was showing Dad the important details of the scene, “That’s me. And here it says ‘Boobies’.”
Dad chuckled. “Well, it sure does! That’s great, Max!”
I stood there, watching the two of them, trying to figure out why my son was drawing pictures of boobies, and why my father was encouraging him. Max set his picture down on the counter next to me as he walked by, and I picked it up casually. It looked pretty much like all the other pictures. There was a tree in the middle, a ripple of grass along the bottom, and three people with their arms splayed out and showing three fingers (I don’t know why three fingers. They all have three fingers). I gazed at it a moment until Dad noticed me puzzling over it. “Isn’t that great?” he enthused. I nodded, not knowing what to say, exactly. “Um…boobies?” I finally asked. “Yeah,” he replied, “See, there are the bees.”
Bees?
I looked again, and sure enough there was a small cloud of specks near one of the figures. That person had his mouth open. He was clearly shouting something. Something like, “Boo!”
It didn’t say “boobies” at all. It said, “Boo, bees!”
I looked at the writing. It clearly read, “Bi Tre end Max. Bo bez.”
Well, if I’d just read it first…