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November 2017

Stitch Fix #1

 

I posted something on Facebook about getting my first Stitch Fix, because Clay was funny. And then my friends HOUNDED me to let them see pictures. So mean. Somehow this seems like a safer place to post these pictures than Facebook, because I haven't posted anything here for almost 11 months, so nearly no one will see this, while I'm Facebook friends with my priest, so. 

Disclaimer: I have no makeup on here. I'm not deathly ill, that's just how I look without makeup. Also, I worked out this afternoon and I just took a so-I-don't-stink kind of shower, but I didn't fix my hair, so that's why. Basically, if I had made an effort you would hardly be able to look at me for my stunning-ness, but that's not how this event came together. (Note: I opted for the exact opposite approach to beautiful women, where they do all the things to look stunning, then say they look terrible. THIS way is way less work.)

Okay, first picture. I kept the purse because I have a problem with purses. I want them all. All of them. This is a cross-body bag with intriguing pockets, and it's cuter than it looks. I think. I have a problem.

The dress is not ON my body (simmer down, Lisa!) because I wanted to show how pretty it is that way. Oh, I wanted to love this dress. I love the style, the print, the length. But oh, is it disappointing when it is on my actual body.

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And here it is. Don't say I didn't warn you.

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RIGHT? Oh, so disappointing. Also, Sophia was taking these pictures, and as she took this one, she said "Oh, and I will be SURE not to get your feet in the picture," so now I'm wondering what's wrong with my feet. 

Moving on. 

I got a pair of jeans, which I am keeping, and now I'm realizing that I don't really have a good picture of the jeans, but they're good and I don't have to go buy them because they are right here, which are two qualities I adore in jeans. Also, here is a shirt that I am not keeping, because I'm not crazy about the color, and it doesn't look bad here, but I'm sucking in my stomach like crazy, so. Also, the high scoop neck gives me enormous boob shelf, which is something I try not to do. It frightens small children.

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Finally, there's a sleeveless top that has a cute print on the back, but meh. It's almost September, and I'm not buying a sleeveless top. Then Sophia took pictures, and I was completely horrified. It truly looks awful on me. Please enjoy my farmer's tan. Look for my YouTube channel about how to effortlessly look stunning. 

 

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So bad. I'm also wondering why I chose such a weird place to take these pictures. Please look for my lifestyle blog, coming soon. 

There you go, you relentless hounds, you! Stitch Fix #1! And now you know....the REST of the story.

EDITED! 

Okay, fine, I didn't want to post the bad picture, because of how bad it is. But THIS IS THE FRONT of the sleeveless shirt.

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You're sorry now, aren't you?