So HEY, happy birthday to me! I gotta tell you; this has been the best birthday of the new millennium. Bar none.
I went out with friends for Mexican food Friday night, out with Clay for insanely expensive steak and a show Saturday night, and today after church my parents took me out for lunch. Plus, all the comments and emails from y'all? I was blown away.
Howzat for loved?
The boys gave me the DVD of The Incredibles, which I knew was coming. We happened to be in Wal-Mart on Tuesday, when it was released. The place was simply AWASH in Incredibles. I mused in passing,
“Hey, maybe we should get a copy,” and Tre and Max looked at each other, stricken.
“Oh…” Tre assumed the MOST CASUAL of tones, “nah. Not today. They’re probably sold out.” Tre? Casual? That was a dead give-away there. This is the child who thinks a five minute wait for the pasta to cook constitutes child abuse, and he will surely DIE by the time it’s done, and he’s STARVING…he is neither casual nor patient by temperament.
“Right,” Max added, “So why don’t we get it…um…Monday?” He gave Tre a proud nod.
“Are you sure you don’t want to get it NOW? I think I see some more copies over there…” I was messin’ with them now.
“Nah,” again, Tre, with such coolness you would think he was barely awake, “let’s not.”
“Yeah,” Max said, “and plus, we’re NOT getting it for your birthday.”
Tre punched him on the arm, and then smiled at me innocently.
But I think I managed to seem appropriately surprised. And I was genuinely delighted at the gift, not only because I managed to get a good hour’s nap on the couch with Clay while the kids watched the new DVD, either.
In other news, Max lost his first tooth Saturday. It had gotten tantalizingly loose, so much so that Tre had taken to chasing him around, sitting on his chest, and berating him to, “JUST LET ME PULL IT OUT!”
Max, enjoying the attention from his big brother, and a touch apprehensive about whether or not it would hurt, would have none of it. But eventually it succumbed…actually, to my dad, who used to be a first grade teacher and is a master at the art of tooth pulling. All day Saturday Max bounced around, displaying his new gap (with the scalloped edge of a new tooth already poking through) with a special-for-the-occasion lower lip retracting smile.
That night he carefully put his tooth in an empty film canister and placed it under his pillow.
The next morning he came to tell me…
The tooth fairy forgot.
Yes. For his VERY FIRST TOOTH she forgot.
What a slacker that fairy is.
And you know, Max has his suspicions about the tooth fairy. I mean, his brother has told him she’s not real, but he thinks she might be. He was pretty disappointed, until I offered to do my best to catch her, turn her over my knee, and give her a tiny little spanking.
“Like this,” I demonstrated, patting my knee seriously with my index finger. He laughed and bounded away, pausing to assure me,
“I bet she’ll remember tonight. She might have been too busy or something.” And he was off, pure gap-toothed joy.
Believe me; the tooth fairy would have been lucky to get off with just a spanking. Gah. Who can live with guilt like that?
You’ll all be pleased to hear that that slacker of a tooth fairy did her job tonight, although she was narrowly tempted to leave the kid $10. Fortunately, she took a moment to calculate how many baby teeth were still ensconced in various mouths in this very house, and decided against such a costly move.
Finally, I got another phone message from the ex. Seems I misunderstood. It wasn’t HEALTH insurance he was calling about. He wants to make his sons his beneficiaries of his LIFE insurance.
Oh yeah! *wipes eyes*
Did I laugh!
I should have known better, I really should have. Same story. He’s willing to die for them, but still not ready to live for them.
Oh well, it was a nice thought.