Night Life

Here’s a quick snapshot of both a) what nights are like for me and b) who my sons ARE, at their core.

Max (still having a bit of a rough time with the night terrors), trotted into my room and flopped on the bed next to me as I sat here, checking out how FAR BEHIND I AM in the voting over at the BoB awards. Jeez, people. And I BEGGED and EVERYTHING.

Anyhow.

Max was irritated by my unyielding laptop that kept bonking him in the head when he did his fish-flopping routine of annoyance at the light being on. He whined great loud whines of disapproval. I patted his back and went on perusing my humiliation. However, the noise soon got to Tre, who is a solid and serious sleeper. So serious a sleeper is he that he declined to actually WAKE UP to protest the noise that was disturbing his rest.

“MOM.” He called out soberly from his bed, “MOM.”

“Yeah, honey?”

“Mom. That… Max…I can’t…AND DON’T MOVE IT, EITHER.”

Tre (as you may have guessed) talks in his sleep. A common concern for him when he’s sleep talking is that I might MOVE SOMETHING. Not sure exactly what that means, but I’m fairly certain it doesn’t point to a great flexibility of spirit. Many of the things Tre has to say when he’s asleep are incomprehensible orders. I called back reassuring things, and he muttered something serious and was quiet.

Max had settled down next to me, so I heaved him up in my arms and lugged him back to his room. Sleeping children are insanely heavy. I set him down in his bed and pulled the covers up to his chin. As I leaned over to kiss his forehead, I was surprised by him reaching up to pat my cheek gently. Loving gestures are not a part of Max’s troubled sleep routine. But for a moment he smiled very sweetly at me, then rolled over with an annoyed yank at the covers.

I turned to Raphael’s bed, and adjusted his blanket and kissed his forehead too, for good measure. But as I leaned over, his eyes popped open, and I SWEAR TO YOU, the child BARKED AT ME.

I jumped, understandably STARTLED, and he burst into peals of laughter. He was HOLDING HIS STOMACH, he was laughing so hard. I still don’t know for sure if he was awake, because I beat a hasty retreat to the calm of my own bed.

So there you have it, Kira’s nightlife. The cast of characters are Tre, the censorious, Max the complex, and Raphael, the giggling goober.

No wonder I need a nap most days.

Comments

only another mom (and one awake at 2:15 am at that) would know how true your night life rings! chris

[chris]

only another mom (and one awake at 2:15 am at that) would know how true your night life rings! chris

[chris]

only another mom (and one awake at 2:15 am at that) would know how true your night life rings! chris

[lizardek]

Holy shit, that was funny! And, I VOTED! I did! I'll go and do it again :)

[Sheryl]

Hee hee ha! Thank you for that profoundly needed laugh. I just spent the last two hours with my stubbornly awake two year-old.

[Jen]

OMG I choked on my water! I can't believe he barked at you LOL!

too too funny, now I don't feel so bad about MY late night giggles/visits

[Stephanie]

This is hysterical! (By the way, I voted for you. One of the proud 3%). My husband talks in his sleep, too - which makes me chuckle in the middle of the night, although I'm usually too sleepy myself to remember the conversations the next morning. Most recently, we were staying at his brother-in-law (Bob)'s house. Bob has a cat, and my husband hates cats. So when I crawled in bed, he shooed me off, hissing "Git-down" in a sufficiently gruff fashion. It took several tries before he understood that his wife - not the cat - was trying to share a bed with him.

ssg

[Heather]

My 7 month old screamed bloody murder all night.

[NM-Kim]

LOL!!!

[libby]

Hey, I've voted for you twice now, woohoo! You are up to 5%! It's hard to compete with all those folks. Yikes, I'm so glad my daughter is a good sleeper.